PERSONAL UNCONSCIOUS

The first layer we want to look at the dream through is level of the personal unconscious, where our complexes reside. Complexes are basically what, in modern day, we would call our “issues”. Their origins lie in our personal histories and we can discover our unconscious complexes through Association.

Example Dream

This is a dream we will use throughout this next section as an example of how to use the technique of Association. This is the dream of a 32 year old person who identifies as female:

I am in the house on Maple Street. I am a teenager and I’m having a party at the house. It’s a lot of fun and I feel ok just letting myself relax because I know my parents won’t be home for another couple of days, they are away on a business trip. Brian is there, and he asks me to sit on the couch with him, which I do. It feels exciting and I’m very attracted to him. I notice he has some ripped up, dirty shoes with no socks. He tells me he likes me a lot and that he wants me to be his girlfriend again. I notice the song that is playing on the stereo Weezer’s “Beverly Hills”. All of the sudden I freak out because I realize that I’m married and I shouldn’t be doing this, and I feel very guilty.

Conscious Attitude

First, we want to consider the conscious attitude, or situation, of the dreamer. The question to ask is, “what has happened in the previous day, or what is dominating your thoughts these days?” Dreams often are responding to events in our day-to-day lives that occurred, or that we are anticipating to occur, within 48 hours.

A dream will do one of three things:

  1. The conscious attitude is one-sided and unbalanced, so the dream provides the opposite position.

  2. The conscious position is correct, so the dream confirms this position.

  3. The conscious attitude is in the middle, and the dream confirms this position.

EXAMPLE DREAM: The dreamer says that she and her husband have been having frequent fights about finances over the past couple of weeks. She is worried about their plans to take a vacation because of how much it will cost. He wants the vacation and says they have the room in the budget, but she is worried they won’t have enough in case an unforeseen event happens. She has been feeling really anxious about the conflict with her husband but is also feeling stressed about their finances, and as a result has had trouble sleeping as well concentrating at her job.

Objective Vs. Subjective

Next, after writing the dream down and considering the conscious attitude, is to decide whether we will be looking at the dream figures, places and themes objectively, or subjectively.

EXAMPLE DREAM: Because we know the dreamer is 32 years old in her day-to-day life and a teenager in the dream, we will know to look at the dream subjectively. This also holds true because the boyfriend is a teenager in the dream, and the dream is set in the dreamer’s old house, which she has not lived in since 10th grade.

Association

Tip

When making associations, don’t associate to the associations! For example, if the dream symbol is a car, keep your associations to the car. Not, “Well, in my dream the car was red. I associate red with anger, and when I think of anger, it reminds me of a teacher I had in second grade . . . .” Keep the associations to the primary symbol, in this case, the color red.

Dream Mood

Now we want to ask about the mood in the dream, both the mood during the dream, and the mood upon waking. Was it stressed or anxious? Were you feeling angry or powerful, or shy and passive in the dream? Did the dream leave you feeling a certain way when you woke up?

EXAMPLE DREAM: The dreamer says she felt really happy, carefree, and “lit up” during the dream. Upon waking, the emotions of the dream lingered, but she also says she is experiencing a lot of guilt for having this kind of dream about an ex-boyfriend, especially an ex that she has just reconnected with. She says she immediately became worried the dream was telling her she should pursue a relationship with him. This is especially worrying to her because her relationship with her husband has been so stressful lately and she has started wondering if they are really compatible. She added an observation that when she remembers back to how she felt while living in the Maple Street house with her parents as a teenager it reminds her of how she’s been feeling in her current life - stressed, anxious about the conflict, very focused on being “good and responsible”.

Putting It Together

Examples of Commonly Found Complexes in Anxiety, Depression or Trauma

  • Jonah complex: The fear of success or the fear of being one's best. This fear prevents the realization of one's own potential. It is the fear of one's own greatness, the evasion of one's destiny, or the avoidance of exercising one's talents. As the fear of achieving a personal worst may serve to motivate personal growth, likewise the fear of achieving a personal best may hinder achievement.

  • Mother complex: pertains to the image of the mother. These impulses may be either positive (admiring and seeking out mother figures) or negative (distrusting or fearful).

  • Persecution complex: It is one of the most common complexes in modern times. In today’s fast and ambitious lifestyle, every person is in a hurry to achieve as much as they can and as fast as possible. The persecution complex makes a person believe that everyone is trying to harm them. The belief of being harmed is irrational and exaggerated and makes the person look at everyone with extreme suspicion.

  • Inferiority complex: Another common complex, it makes the person believe that they are unworthy or less capable than others. They may overcompensate because of this complex and achieve great things, yet they never believe that they have achieved enough success. An inferiority complex may make the person resentful and dissatisfied, making them avoid social interactions.

  • Medusa complex is a psychological complex evolving around the petrification or freezing of human emotion.

  • Father complex: pertains to the image of the father. These impulses may be either positive (admiring and seeking out father figures) or negative (distrusting or fearful).

  • Guilt complex: This makes the person blame themselves for everything that goes wrong. They are excessively self-critical and think that they are accountable for every bad happening. They are overly sensitive to others’ opinions and put all their efforts into trying to make things better.

For further examples and reading about complexes (the information above was also taken from these sources):

Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complex_(psychology)#Examples

Medicine.net

https://www.medicinenet.com/what_are_the_different_complexes/article.htm#:~:text=Different%20complexes%20include%20the%20Oedipus,God%2C%20guilt%20and%20martyr%20complexes.

www.Medicinenet.com

Medical Author: Shaziya Allarakha, MD

  • I don’t deserve love.

  • I am a bad person.

  • I am terrible.

  • I am worthless (inadequate).

  • I am shameful.

  • I am not lovable.

  • I am not good enough.

  • I deserve only bad things.

  • I am permanently damaged.

  • I am ugly (my body is hateful).

  • I do not deserve . . .

  • I am stupid (not smart enough).

  • I am insignificant (unimportant).

  • I am a disappointment.It’s not okay to feel (show) my emotions.

  • I cannot stand up for myself.

  • I cannot let it out.

  • I am not in control.

  • I am powerless (helpless).

  • I am weak.

  • I cannot get what I want.

  • I am a failure (will fail).

  • I cannot succeed.

  • I have to be perfect (please everyone).

  • I cannot stand it.

  • I am inadequate.

  • I cannot trust anyone.

  • I deserve to be miserable.

  • I am different (don’t belong).

  • I should have done something.

  • I did something wrong.

  • I should have known better.

  • I cannot be trusted.

  • I cannot trust myself.

  • I cannot trust my judgment.

  • I cannot trust anyone.

  • I cannot protect myself.

  • I am in danger.

Other Ways of Viewing Complexes Found In Anxiety, Depression & Trauma

In Beliefs About Self:

In Patterns of Behavior:

  • Addiction

  • Perfectionism

  • Difficulties asking for what you need or want

  • Self-sabotage

  • Compulsive Accommodation (always focused on others’ needs and wants instead of your own)

  • Self-critical

  • Avoidance (of relationships, of more responsibility, of owning feelings, etc.)

  • Lack of Boundaries

  • Over-valuing logic, undervaluing emotion

  • Approval-seeking

  • Compulsive cleaning, planning, organizing; anything to feel more “in control”